What to expect on delivery day

28 Sep What to expect on delivery day

You have jumped through all the hoops and the day is finally arriving, delivery day!! You’re excited, nervous, and every emotion in between. So what should you expect on delivery day? The answer to this question is not so black-and-white. The truth is there are a lot of different variables that go into play for every delivery (whether it’s a surrogacy pregnancy or not). 

In an attempt to prepare you for delivery day, we are going to answer some of the most common questions in regards to delivery day. So let’s dive in!

What do I need to bring to the hospital with me?

Both Surrogates and Intended Parents should bring the following items with them to the hospital

• The Certified Parentage Order (it’s best to hand this to the L&D social worker when you check in)
• A copy of your Surrogacy Contract
• All insurance cards
• ID
• Copies of your birth plan (if you have one)
• Phone numbers of all lawyers involved in your journey
• Normal pregnancy items for delivery (clothes, snacks, chargers, entertainment etc..)
• Baby clothes! 

Optional: Identification markers for hospital staff to recognize who Mom, Dad, Surrogate, and Surrogate’s Partner is. This could be t-shirts, hats, buttons, ribbons etc…

Will I and my partner be able to be in the room with our surrogate during delivery?

First and foremost, you will need to know the policy at the hospital in which the surrogate is delivering. Each hospital has its own policy, and does not guarantee more than one person in the delivery room. Once the policy is understood, all parties involved (the Surrogate and their partner, and both Intended Parents) must agree on who will be in the room during delivery. There is no right or wrong answer to this question and will depend on what everyone is comfortable with. It’s also important to discuss multiple scenarios so everyone is on the same page regardless of the original plan. Babies will come when they are good and ready so it’s helpful to be prepared for any scenario.

How does paperwork work at the hospital? 

Each hospital has their own paperwork process. Some hospitals have more experience with surrogate pregnancies than others, but it’s good to remind staff who the parents are and who the surrogate is. Your case manager will contact the hospital before delivery to ensure everyone is aware and that the paperwork is completed properly. If you have questions before (or when you’re at the hospital) about your paperwork, call your case manager. 

Who will receive the baby when it’s born?

This topic should be discussed with the surrogate before going into delivery. Once at the hospital, the plan should be expressed to the hospital staff. Who tells the hospital staff will be dependent on who is there before delivery. If there is a miscommunication and the baby is not directly handed to the intended parents, it will be okay! As long as the baby goes home with its intended parents, it will not remember who held it first. 

Will both Intended Parents and Surrogates get their own room?

There is no guarantee that both Intended Parents and Surrogate will get their own rooms. Hospitals will try to accommodate to the best of their ability, but it will depend on how many deliveries occur on that day and how many rooms are available. Some hospitals will have both parties share a room, or put Intended Parents and baby in the nursery while the surrogate will receive a room. Unfortunately, you will not know if you have your own room until delivery day, so try to prepare yourself for each scenario. 

When can everyone meet the baby?

Only intended parents can answer this question. The most important thing for Intended Parents is to ensure both parents do at least one hour of skin-to-skin contact within the first few hours of life. The hospital will have visitor guidelines to follow, but as far as how soon they can visit is up to you. 

We do recommend that you allow your surrogate and their immediate family (partner and children) to meet the baby before they leave the hospital. By letting them see the baby with the new parents gives a sense of accomplishment and full understanding for the surrogate and their family. This is something that you should discuss with your surrogate before delivery, but also important to feel out during delivery day. If delivery was more intense than you planned, the surrogate may not want visitors until the next day. A suggestion is to assign someone from each party to keep in contact with each other throughout the delivery and after so there’s no miscommunication. There will be a lot going on that day and a lot of emotions, try to stay flexible.

Remember, the most important thing on delivery day is that both the baby and the surrogate are safe and healthy. Baby will know its parents and will be loved and protected its whole life. Things may not go as planned, and that’s okay, we are here to help you. If you have any questions on what to expect on delivery day, please reach out to us!